Monday, August 14, 2006

Seasons

Well, this is my post for the month, or at least that’s what it seems like. I’ve been extremely busy lately. It’s kind of like the circus. From the spectator’s seat, the show is amazing, the pace is fast, and the performers seem to have the best job in the world. Backstage, however, the performers are scrambling to change costumes, bumping into each other, sweaty, and, believe it or not, have their own problems to deal with when they get off work.

Ingrid and I are both working hard towards our goal of the December wedding. For those who have done this before me, you know what I’m talking about. Not only is the planning and growing together difficult, but the finances become a source of anxiety as both of you push yourselves so hard. It seems like one struggle or endurance race after another. Right now, we are currently in the last leg, hopefully, of her house sell. Before that it was the struggle of getting her moved into a safe, inexpensive, temporary apartment while she was trying to learn a new job. Also, she’s had to move away from her long-time church with little or no time to prepare for the impact emotionally. For me, it’s mostly been a journey of humility, realizing that there’s so much that I need to work on before I can be the husband and father that I desire to be and that I see God calling me to be.

I guess the one necessary principle that runs throughout these events is the need for Christ, my need to trust, and the real need for real power and real peace. Something happened today that seems appropriate. I had just pulled into the driveway and I was pulling the trashbin back from the street to under the carport, when something caught my eyes from under the black, plastic bag where I put all the recyclables. A six or seven inch ‘tail’ was slithering behind the bag. At first I thought iguana because of the coloring and spots, but then I realized that this was the end of a pretty large snake, one that looked poisonous. Its color and markings definitely said ‘stay away’ to me.

I got my camera and was going to take a picture to show my friends, but then it didn’t come out. It sort of just found a crack and tucked itself away, so now it’s not an entertaining piece of conversation, but a real threat. Just now, I was going to run out to my truck and grab a book. I’ve done it a hundred times without thinking about it, barefoot and all, but not now. I have a new awareness of danger and my need to see where I’m going. I need Christ, to make things work, to survive, to simply run out to my truck at night, I need Christ.

2 Comments:

At 1:43 PM, Blogger brian said...

Great post...no funny parts. As I was reading it was kind of like when billy is excited and has his tongue out and is breathing hard, and then you do something, and he stops, closes his mouth, puts his ears up, and tilts his head to the side as if pondering. And then after a few seconds he gets excited again.

 
At 6:35 PM, Blogger Joshua said...

Thanks for being such a 'good listener.' Fetch!

 

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